Ok, so now I am getting REALLY controversial. Especially since I am coming at most topics from a Christian perspective, and the Twilight books are looked at as being anything but Christian. But before you, born again believing Christian that you are, judge this book, let me try to defend it, and tell you exactly what it means to me. You may at the end of this post think I am truly crazy, and that I have lost it. But this is about being honestly truthful and showing you my perspective. Take it or leave it, you can't deny or discredit my own experience.
Just to preface, I will tell you a little bit about the Twilight series. Bottom line, its about vampires and humans that shape shift into wolves. Sounds like your typical vampire story? It's anything but. There is the main plot of the story where one of the vampires, Edward, and a human girl, Bella, fall in love with each other. They are tortured by a dilema. How can they stay together when Edward wants to "eat" Bella all the time? They conclude by saying they are very foolish and stupid, even masochistic, but that they love each other and they are going to work things out. Then the rest of the story in the all 4 books plays out, based on this plot. There are dangers to be had, and life and limb is risked, just so they can stay together.
Now let me tell you why I was so touched by this story. In an emotional way, it reached me at the core of my being. Why? Because for all intents and puposes, Bella's character describes how I feel about just about everything. She wants to fight for the safety of her family. So do I. She wants to disappear and be invisible. So do I. She loves one man (even though he is a vampire) with all her might, and she gave everything to him. And the fear of losing him overpowered her. I have done this too. Bella and I have shared experience. The only real difference between her and myself is that she lives in a magical world full of vampires. We know that vampires don't exist. But all her emotions are the same as mine. And I believe that what is interpreted as her weakness, is actually where she has the most strength. Namely she loves with everything she has, till it looks like she has no power left. But that's exactly where she gets her power from.
You see, I lost the man I wanted more than anything in the world. Thats where Bella's and my world part. Her story, I would like to think, is what my life could have been if the man, Bill, would have come back to me. So my story is what Bella's might have looked like if she had been truly given the opportunity to live without Edward. Yes, there was a big hole in her chest, so to speak, when Edward told her he didn't want her in his life. But she may have learned with time to love someone else, and to find perhaps an even deeper love and joy than she could have imagined.
This is a very current topic with me, since I just realized yesterday that I am still very much in love with Bill, and probably doomed to be for the rest of my life. You see, by a random chance, or what I like to call a terrible God moment, I saw Bill for the first time in many years. It was just a glance. That's all it took. And the flood gates opened, and I was back to being very much in love with him. Yes, all it took was a glance. But this time, my life isn't going to fall apart. Why? because I have friends who accept me as I am, and I can talk to them about anything. So I will, for the first time, let others support me through this trying time I am going through.
Back to Twilight though. What else I like about the story is that it is very much about good vs. evil. Not just external evil, but internal as well. You see, it is true that vampires are killers by nature. But the Cullen clan doesn't feed off of humans. They restrain their thirst, and drink the blood of animals instead. They fight the very natural but evil tendencies that they have to kill humans, and they become better because of it. This, to me, is the ultimate good and evil fight. We all have evil desires in our hearts. We are not basically good. We are sinners, and we do the wrong thing. Sure, some of us are better than others, and the evil in our hearts doesn't come out that much. But we all have great potential to do bad things.
So those are my thoughts on this Twilight book series. You may think I have just gone off the deep end with all of this. After all, isn't it just a book? My church has said that reading these books is a bad thing, and to stay away from them. But the fact is, I learned more about myself by reading Twilight then years of going to church. Am I being sacreligious? Am I being heretical? I don't think so. I am just being honest. God will speak to you in whatever way He has to to touch your heart. If he has to do it through a book other than the Bible, cause you just aren't reading it anymore, then He will. If he needs to speak to you through a movie cause thats all you do is watch movies, then He will. The point is, God has no limitations in the ways He will reach out to you. So I guess I started this post by talking about vampires, but I will end it by telling you that God loves you. He loved me enough to inspire Stephenie Meyer, the author of the Twilight books, to write a story that God knew would touch me in such a powerful way. I am not really advocating looking for God in anything other than the Bible and at church. What I am saying is let God meet you exactly where you are. Seek Him with every fiber of your being, and He will reveal Himself to you in ways you can't imagine. He will break down your defenses to get to you, and that's the truth. Just let Him in. Thank you for bearing with me on this post. These are just more thoughts from the mind of Crystal.
by: Crystal Nylander
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